Five things you can do to improve Facebook

1. Those gorgeous pictures of food porn in magazines? Trick lighting and varnish. That lovely dish you're having for dinner? Like Joan Rivers without makeup. Just eat it. 

2. Awww, your baby is just too cute for words. No more than one photo a month, please. 

3. Cute pictures of cats. See Item 2. 

4. If you're still in Farmville, do what your ancestors have done: Sell the farm and move to town. 

5. Photos of signage with misapplied apostrophes. Even nerds deserve a richer life than this.